Old Equals Invisible

I'd be the first to admit that when I was younger and cruising up gay bars, I would see right past the old guys and ignore they even existed.  I would, if it was true.  I was that rare guy that was into much older men even when I was in my twenties.  My friends hated it, but I loved it because I had little or no competition.  It was nothing for my friends to see me go home with someone twenty years my senior and return in the morning with a big smile on my face.

All daddy issues aside, I see now how those older men must have felt when they went to gay bars.  I have tried to smile at younger men in the club, I have tried to start conversations out of sheer politeness, but I was treated like I was invisible, or worse, like I was some sort of infectious disease no one wanted to get close to.  Shallow, I know.  But in the spirit of that same shallow mentality, I haven't been to a gay bar in ages because I realized there was no one there that I found physically attractive.  In my mind, I was still the "boy" looking for a daddy.  Now that I am of grandfather age, I can't see too many guys in their seventies or eighties working the dancefloor appreciating the attention I so sincerely gave them.  But that's okay.

While I still have no attraction to "bois" or twinks, I am still attracted to the daddy types at or around my age.  I just have to accept they may not be interested in me because I'm not that admiring twenty-something that was ready to rock their world.  Come to think of it, there's not really much world-rocking these days for me, anyway.

So if you're old, you're gay, and you're being treated like you're invisible,... you need to move on.  Find an environment where you are still seen as a human being with physical, spiritual and emotional needs and desires.  Clubs and bars are nothing but flesh factories.  And my flesh isn't competition-grade anymore.  And that's okay, too.  Remember if you want a good piece of meat, you can go to a steakhouse.

Being old is not the end of life.  Being old just means you've experienced most of the games the kids are still out there trying to figure out.  Use that experience, and make a friend.  At our age, life doesn't always revolve around our dick.  Our bodies perform differently, we value friendship over fucking, and most of the time, we'd rather curl up with a good show than dangle the night away in a sex sling.

If you still feel the need to be adored by someone younger that will show you sexual appreciation at the drop of a dime, there's nothing wrong with that, either.  Just don't play the games.  Find yourself a daddy-chaser, or hire an expensive escort, so you can get over your urges and come back to the couch.




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